Wow has it been since Dec was the last time I wrote, time sure does fly. So I have some time to catch up on my thoughts and feelings. We ended up moving our wonderful landlords let their place go into foreclosure and rather than waiting for the bank to kick us out, we found a wonderful place actually a house just a couple of miles from where we were at. I am still feeling shafted over that whole situation. We were basically their cash cow for the last 5 months and had no idea. I will get over it, but over $6,000 for nothing. I cannot wait to own our own place. So it was my birthday a couple of weeks ago, the big 28. I still feel 16, I really do believe age is just a number after a certain point. What really counts is knowledge and maturity. So I have many thoughts running through my head. I just read one of my friend's blogs and got me thinking about my own marriage and evaluating it at this point. I realize that I am terrified that I will become a statistic, so many people are divorcing. I am a fan of celebrity gossip(I know bad habit), it worries me when celebs are splitting up left and right. When I hear of friends getting divorced it just sends me into a tail spin of what if. As many of you know we had an incident of infidelity almost a year ago. I think that it will always be a tender spot for me, it doesn't make me think any less of my husband or wanting to have revenge on him, in fact it makes me cling more to making my marriage work. I honestly do not know what I would do if we did split. He is all the cliches of the movies make. He may not be the most romantic person, which is funny cause he comes from a family of sisters, but he is my other half. I think that if I did not feel this way I would have walked away and not looked back. I think that is what makes it different for us. Almost a year ago my wonderful father gave me a blessing that truly has helped me through this. He told me that after everything was over with, my husband would love me more than he has ever. How powerful is that? I feel that I am not dragging the past, but writing is my therapy. I hope that my words and experiences can help someone that has or is going through the same thing. I am not angry, but sometimes it still hurts. Especially the thought of everything we have done, made, accomplished, for a fling.
On a lighter note, I should have my bachelor's next year and am thinking about going for my Master's. We are now trying for a fourth, it has not come as easy as the last three, maybe I am getting older body wise. Oh well just keep trying. The kids tell me that they want another sister and then tell dad that they want another brother, smart kids.
