Wow, having a baby sure takes up the time. I just realized the last post I made was back in June. Time flies. So since then we had Bearett 8 lbs 3 oz, the biggest baby I had and the last. At first I kind of regretted having my tubes tied, thinking just one more would be kind of fun and then I came to my senses. I love having four, of course I am outnumbered, but I can spend the time I need for each one. I feel like my family is complete and I do not have to go through pregnancy again!! This last one was the hardest, around the seventh month, it physically hurt trying to do homework on the computer was excruciating. I still do not know how I got through it. Speaking of school, I am officially graduated, just have to wait 8-12 weeks for that diploma to arrive. I'm so excited, now to find a job and think about going for my Masters.
So not only is this post to catch up, but also some insight of what I have been up to. Yes, religion is still on the back burner and the only time it is brought up is when we want to have a discuss, kids bring in up, or family. Hopefully it has been accepted that we want nothing to do with it or they are gearing up for an intervention, lol.
Yes, our marriage has gotten way better, I have to give credit to the therapy I have been going to. It is like magic, I do not have the overwhelming guilt that I had been carrying. It has been great to talk to someone outside of my circle that does not know me or graig. They can be that soundboard, of the decisions that have already been made, but need someone's new perspective. Even graig has had to admit that this really hurt us and it runs deep with me. But, with each session, that pain lessens. I recommend therapy for anyone that needs that soundboard. It is also the career I have decided to go into. One I can work on the bases to help military families as therapy has helped me and two I like to listen.
Another thing that has been on my mind for awhile is our daughter Electa. All you know that she was diagnosed at four with ADHD/ODD. We thought this is all we would have to deal with and that we could handle anything that is thrown at us. Just this last week, her doctor is wanting to run more psychological tests and have me get a second opinion, but he feels that she might have a mood disorder. This has been heartbreaking and I'm sort of in denial. All I can think of is how can kids have disorders that were originally thought to be just adult disorders. I had a good friend tell me that tests have come along ways from when we were kids and all those cases they are now dealing with today. It is better to get those tests done and figure out what needs to be done and get through it.
I know that we will get through it, but I wish life would be a little more easier for her. Damn genes, lol. Maybe I have many things to learn through her trials.
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